**pictures included show the good, bad and the ugly - please be open minded**
Feb 1st 2019 - Jan 10th 2019, my alarm goes off at 4:45am. Today I wake up nervous and scared, today I undergo a surgery I never thought in my life I would have to go through. Today I was getting a mastectomy of the left breast, sentinel node biopsy and DIEP Flap reconstruction of the left breast. This damn cancer will be out of me, I may be nervous, and scared but I'm going to push through and rid you once and for all cancer.
Today I have to be at University Hospital in London for 6:00am. With all the snow that has come in throughout the night, it ends up being a slower drive, but a drive that didn't seem long enough. I can feel the butterflies in my stomach and my heart in my throat....I feel sick. I'm starting to get anxious knowing I can't turn back, that it has to be done, no changing my mind.
The only comfort I have today is knowing I have the best people with me; Mom and Dad, giving me the utmost support and love. They are the ones keeping me calm as best as they can.
We get checked in and sit down to wait - my "number" is called shortly after, now it truly begins. (for privacy they use numbers instead of your name - mine was 1952).
I cant help it but start to get emotional before I am wheeled into the operating room; the big questions come up again "why me"?, "what did I do to deserve this"? - again no answer to follow. I'm scared out of my mind; what if it doesn't work, what if they don't get all of the tumour, what's the pain going to be like after, what if, what if, what if...….
The doctors greet me in the room and tell me everything is going to be okay, I'm in good hands as I meet the nurses and resident who will b working by their side today.
The surgery is going to be between 8-10 hours, possible 12 if they have trouble finding the blood vessels deep in my belly. I'll be asleep of course, not knowing how long it really will be; but it's Mom and Dad who will be anxiously waiting for up dates.
I have to give a big shout out to my wonderful family who made sure my parents were taken care of; Aunt Sherri, Uncle Darrin, Aunt June and Uncle Ron... thank you for visiting with them throughout the day.
As I lay on the table with tears rolling down my cheek, I feel the warmth of the blanket they have covered me with, I hear voices and as I look around I notice all the bright lights above me - the next thing I know I'm starting to get sleepy; I ask "am I going to sleep now"?, the nurse nods her head and says "yes" - I'm out.
Time has flown for me, I hear "Krista, Krista - it's time to wake up"... it's over already? I must have had a little sense in me still (or I'm just plain crazy!), I ask right away; "what time is it"? response: 4:10pm...."oh good so 8 hours" ; next question "do I have a boob"?, response: "yes a beautiful one", next question "do I have a nipple"?, response "sorry, you don't".
Sure that sucked to hear, but I wasn't as upset about it as I thought I would be, I was more happy to hear the surgery went well and the doctor was able to perform the reconstruction with no issue.
The order of surgery went as followed; oncology surgeon performed the sentinel node biopsy and the left mastectomy, as that was happening the plastic surgeon was cutting open my belly and starting to collect the tissue, fat and blood vessels. Once the mastectomy was done the plastic surgeon started the reconstruction, while his chief resident sewed my belly up.
8.5hrs and I was done - headed to recovery. I wake up in the room with Mom and Dad's hello shortly to follow.... I did it, I made it through.
The next 48 hours however are the most crucial - I'll be checked every hour with a "doppler" to make sure there is blood flow in the replaced blood vessels in my new left breast.
If this goes south in the next 48 hours I'll be sent back to the operating room and the reconstructed breast will be removed - the prayers start.
I feel bloated, sore and tired for the next few days as I lay in the hospital bed. I'm pumped full of fluid by IV continuously for the next few days.... thank goodness for the catheter!!
I don't think I have slept that much in a long time, sorry to my visitors who made the trek to London to see me; Britt, Kate, Levi, Arlynn, Lucas, Drew, Lacy, Jess, Aunt Sherri, Alisha, Candice, Uncle Ron, Aunt June, Uncle Rob and Aunt Shelley. (I hope I got everyone... unless you snuck in while I was sleeping haha)
I never felt alone, that was for sure.. I have the best support system around!
The nurses got me up and sitting in the chair and starting to walk.. no rest for the wicked I tell ya... it was time to move and get on the mend.
The 48 hour time frame had come to an end - success!!! Everything went wonderful, the doctor, resident and nurses are very pleased with the outcome. I'm so happy!
A couple more days and I'll be on my way home.
By the time I am ready to go home, I've been able to get out and in bed myself, fully sit up in the chair and walk to the bathroom on my own... I'm feeling great, just get me out of here, I'm ready to go home now.
Mom and Dad load me up in the car and we travel the hour down the 402, at home I am greeted by Katelyn and Drew. I'm so grateful to have such much love around me.
Day one at home, just the beginning of the 6 week recovery.
Positive Note: I made it through surgery and it was a complete success! I was scared out my mind, but I stayed as brave as I could, for no one but myself - I again concurred the next step in this long journey. Next chapter, please.